If a work injury is received in the course of activities associated with a source of increased danger (IPO), then the employer is obliged to compensate the victim for the damage caused by the source. Consider the features of the implementation of compensation.
According to Art. 1079 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation, activities related to PET should be recognized as any activity, the implementation of which creates an increased likelihood of harm due to the impossibility of full control over PET by a person (for example, driving a vehicle (TS), conducting construction works), as well as the use, transportation, storage of items, substances and other objects for industrial, economic or other purposes that have the properties of a source of increased danger (in particular, storage, spraying of pesticides).
What is considered an IPO?
Paragraph 1 of Art. 1079 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation contains a list of IPO: the use of vehicles, mechanisms, electrical energy high voltage, explosives, etc., construction and other related activities, etc. It should be noted that this list is not exhaustive. This means that the court, taking into account the special properties of objects, substances or other objects used in the course of activities, is also entitled to recognize PPE as other activities not specified in the list.
The court has the right to recognize the activity as a source of increased danger, taking into account the special properties of objects, substances or other objects used in the process of the named activity.
According to the Supreme Court, damage is considered to be caused by a source of increased danger if it is the result of the action of this source or the manifestation of its harmful properties (for example, an injury resulting from an accident). However, if the harm is caused by the IPO, but is not a manifestation or consequence of its harmful properties, then the harm is compensated for common grounds(for example, a passenger, opening the door of a standing car, causes bodily harm to a citizen passing by).
Liability for damage caused by IPO
Consider examples of court decisions. Resolution of the Ninth Arbitration Court of Appeal dated September 16, 2013 No. 09AP-27306 / 2013-GK in case No. A40-140375 / 12: when deciding to dismiss the appeal, the court was guided by the fact that the pipeline on which the subcontractor performed hot work was not in operation , was disconnected and cut, so the damage was not caused by the IPO, since it was not the result of its action or the manifestation of its harmful properties.
The general contractor entered into an agreement with the subcontractor, under the terms of which the latter undertook to perform a set of works on the installation of the pipeline. During the work in the pipeline there was a burst of gas, as a result of which the shock wave propagated through the pipe caused harm to the health of the concrete worker. Based on this fact, an accident report was drawn up at work.
In a claim for compensation for harm to health and compensation for non-pecuniary damage, funds were recovered from the subcontractor for whom the concrete worker worked. The court pointed out that the general contractor is not responsible for the harm caused to the life and health of the named employee.
The subcontractor could not prove that the damage was caused by the IPO (pipeline), that is, it was the result of its action or the manifestation of its harmful properties. The subcontractor's reference to the fact that, under the act, the construction site was not transferred to him by the contractor was rejected by the court of appeal, since the work that caused the accident was carried out within the framework of a contractual relationship, under the terms of which the subcontractor is responsible for the safe performance of work, but he did not provide proper technical supervision and control over the safety of work.
The Appellate ruling of the Kaliningrad Regional Court dated July 23, 2014 in case No. 33-3201/2014 is also indicative. The car was damaged after hitting a cow that entered the roadway at night. The owner of the car filed a lawsuit against the organization that owned the cow. The court of first instance found the owner of the cow guilty of failing to ensure proper supervision of the animals, in connection with which one of the cows crossed the road unattended at night, becoming an IPO.
The Court of Appeal overturned this decision, not recognizing the animal IPO. The court took into account that the harm caused by the cow was not the result of the action or manifestation of its harmful properties. If the cow damaged the car by attacking it and butting it with its horns, then the court would be on the side of the car owner. However, in the situation with an accident, the court indicated that a cow (a domestic animal, that is, an animal used by a person in its activities) located on a highway cannot be recognized as an IPO. There was no intention of the owner of the cow to cause harm. Therefore, the court considered that the actions of the organization to which the cow belonged were not guilty of causing material damage to the car owner. The court pointed to the direct fault of the driver in such an accident: he was driving a car (IPO) at a speed that did not correspond to road and meteorological conditions, not taking into account visibility in the direction of travel (twilight, fog), the nature of the terrain, the possibility of animals appearing in this area roads and features of their behavior.
Who owns the IPO?
The obligation to compensate for the damage caused by IPO is assigned to the owner of this source (clause 1, article 1079 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation).
Under owner of a source of increased danger to be understood or a citizen who use IPO by virtue of their ownership right, the right of economic management, operational management, or on other legal grounds (for example, under a lease, rental agreement, by proxy for the right to drive a vehicle, by virtue of an order from the relevant authority to transfer the IPO to it).
When determining the owner of an IPO, a number of questions also arise.
Who is the owner of the IPO if the rental period of the car has expired, but the driver-tenant is the culprit of the accident?
Contract expiration does not terminate the obligations of the parties under the contract. If the car is not handed over to the lessor after the expiration of the lease term in accordance with the agreement, then the lessee is recognized as the owner of the IPO at the time of the accident. In addition, if the lease contains conditions for its automatic renewal, it will be considered renewed if these conditions are met.
Consider the Resolution of the Arbitration Court of the North-Western District dated October 6, 2014 in case No. A56-78428 / 2013. The rental car collided with a truck. The tenant who was driving the car was found guilty of the accident. According to the contract, the rental period of the car at the time of the accident has expired. Therefore, the owner of the compensation for damage to the truck through the court recovered from the lessor as the owner of the vehicle. The courts of first instance and appeal recognized the claims as justified and subject to satisfaction.
However, if the guilt of the owner in the unlawful seizure of this source from his possession will be established, then liability can be assigned both to the owner and to the person who unlawfully took possession of the IPO.
Consider the Appellate ruling of the Kemerovo Regional Court dated November 13, 2014 in case No. 33-10775. The juvenile was involved in an accident while driving. The court ordered the sister, as the owner of the IPO, to compensate for the damage caused to the car of the second participant in the accident. On appeal, the sister denied her guilt, stating that her brother stole the keys to the vehicle when she was sleeping, that is, he took possession of the vehicle without the consent of the owner. The court dismissed the complaint, concluding that there was guilt in the actions of the IPO owner. Being at the place of residence of her minor brother, she did not ensure the safety of the IPO belonging to her, since she allowed free access to the keys to the car and to the car itself of a person who did not have the right to drive it. The fact that she did not expect her brother to use her car at his own discretion did not remove her responsibility. The degree of guilt of the owner of the car was recognized by the panel of judges as equal to 70%, the degree of guilt of the tortfeasor -30%.
A similar decision is in the Appellate ruling of the Chelyabinsk Regional Court dated August 26, 2014 in case No. 11-8017/2014. The man was drinking vodka with a casual acquaintance, leaving the keys in the ignition. The drinking buddy took advantage of the opportunity and stole a car, which later caused an accident. The panel of judges recognized the degree of guilt of the owner of the car and the perpetrator of the accident in equal shares.
When a person files a claim for recovery of damage caused by IPO, the plaintiff must prove: the fact of the occurrence of harm, the causal relationship between the actions of the defendant and the occurrence of harm, and the amount of harm. The claim for the recovery of damages can only be satisfied if the totality of all elements of liability is established. When determining the amount of compensation, the court takes into account the degree of guilt of both the tortfeasor and the victim.
Paragraph. 1 st. 1079 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation.
Clause 18 of the Decree of the Plenum of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation of January 26, 2010 No. 1 “On the application by the courts of civil legislation governing relations on obligations due to infliction of harm to the life or health of a citizen” (hereinafter - Decree of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation No. 1).
All people are different. Some people never give a damn, even for serious reasons, while others will always find a reason to worry, even the smallest one. Psychologists say that the latter have a sense of increased responsibility, which constantly keeps them in suspense and prevents them from living. What to do in such a situation? Here are some recommendations.
A hyper-responsible person seeks to be responsible not only for what happens in his life, but also for what happens in the lives of other people. And also for situations that do not depend on him at all. It is typical for him to help someone to the detriment of his own interests. And he will feel embarrassed if the obligations that he has assumed cannot be fulfilled even for objective reasons.
Let's say you introduced your girlfriend to a man from your environment, but their relationship did not work out. And now you feel guilty - after all, it was you who brought them together! Although they could meet with the same success themselves, and you can in no way be responsible for the development of relations between two adult independent people. Or you recommended someone from your acquaintances to work in your company, and the person was out of place there. But after all, you couldn’t foresee everything - you just brought the applicant to the employer, and then it’s their job to evaluate each other!
So the first recommendation. Develop self-confidence. Many people are too worried about what others will think of them, how they will react to their actions. But this makes us dependent on the opinions of others and limits us in our own decisions. Psychologists advise you to imagine that no one praises or condemns you at all. Just do as you see fit. Don't worry about what your girlfriends will say about your new boyfriend - it's enough that he suits you. And what difference does it make what colleagues think about your new dress? Or how will your parents and friends react when they find out that you quit your job and started your own business?
Take some of the responsibility off yourself. Do not take full responsibility for the situation - no one in the world can do this. If you recommend someone to someone, specify that you cannot foresee how this person will behave in this or that case - let your interlocutor draw conclusions on their own. When advising goods or services, say that it suits you personally, but you cannot guarantee that the interlocutor will like it. He wants to - let him try. Emphasize that you cannot account for everything possible options developments - this way you protect yourself from possible reproaches.
Make compromises with yourself. If the number of problems that have piled on you tends to infinity, solve the highest priority ones first. Don't take responsibility for everything that happens. Let's say you promised to go shopping with a friend over the weekend, but suddenly a lot of household chores hit you, and some that cannot be postponed. You should not show miracles of heroism and try to make sure that both the wolves are fed and the sheep are safe. Call a friend and tell her that the shopping trip will have to be rescheduled, or let her go alone. Offended? That's her problem, not yours!
Set specific goals for yourself. We often have something wrong in life because we have little idea of what exactly we want. Let's say you're looking for a new job, but none of the options come up. Maybe the reason is that we have not decided what kind of activity you want to do, with what salary and schedule?
Or are you unable to arrange a personal life because you have very vague ideas about the ideal partner? You try to build relationships with one or the other, but after a while everything gets upset ... And every time something doesn’t work out, do you feel your own guilt? Psychologists advise in this case to take a piece of paper and write on it a list of qualities that you would like to see in a partner: for example, attractive appearance, intelligence, sense of humor, lack of material and housing problems, and so on. The same goes for your dream job.
Keep records. We all tend to constantly scroll through problems in our heads, trying to figure out ways to solve them. This leads to the fact that we sleep poorly and get up in the morning not in the best shape. If you write down your thoughts and possible ways out of difficult situations, it will be easier for you to sort out each specific case on the shelves and resolve everything. You can keep a diary, take notes on a computer, or have a notepad and pen with you. As soon as something comes to mind, write it down! At night, put a notebook near the bed: suddenly wise thoughts will visit you in the morning.
If you follow these tips, you will see that your life will become much easier.
People who do not have clear boundaries feel responsible for what they should not be responsible for. For example, for other people's feelings, frustrations and actions. They feel guilty if they cannot do everything that others want them to do. They feel bad because they cannot fulfill "their" duty to make others happy.
Irresponsibility
People who feel heightened responsibility for others often neglect their own needs. They do not "carry their own burdens" (Gal. 6:5) because they are too busy carrying the burdens of others. In this case, the person feels so strongly responsible for others that he does not work on his own pain and does not live his life.
sense of duty
Paul mentions (see: 1 Cor. 9:7) that people are coerced when they do not decide for themselves what to give and what not to give to others. They feel they have an obligation to give, that they are not free to control their lives.
Feelings of humiliation
Some people care a lot about others and think that others have a responsibility to take care of them. They feel humiliated if this does not happen. They accuse others of not being loved or cared for. Although in reality, others simply do not take on their responsibilities. Such people feel they are "giving", while others are considered "receiving".
Insulation
People who have difficulty with personal boundaries, suffer from distorted thinking and a lack of freedom, often avoid relationships because they consider their absence to be personal boundaries. For them, rapprochement with someone means breaking the borders and mastering their own territory. They try to avoid intimacy and choose isolation as one of the ways to maintain boundaries. This is a very dangerous personality conflict. But for such people, being alone means avoiding encroachment on their territory and control from others.
Increased addiction
People who have not developed the ability to own their lives are sure that they cannot function normally on their own. They often become attached to another person in the hope that he will arrange the outside world for them. They become dependent on that person and tend to identify with the person who controls their life. They are very afraid of distance.
Disorganization and lack of direction
People who do not have a clear definition of themselves often lose direction and purpose in life. They cannot determine their own goals, decide what. they like and what they don't like. They very easily accept everything that other people say about them, and therefore do not have a stable inner position in life.
Alcohol, drug and food abuse
Many people who feel they are not in control of their lives begin to abuse food, drugs, or alcohol, either to ease their pain or to have control over something in their lives. This is especially true for those who suffer from anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa. Boundaries are almost always an important concept in these disorders.
Very often, personal boundaries are the right solution in the fight against addiction. Usually, when the broken boundaries begin to recover, when people who abuse food, alcohol and drugs become clearly aware of their own personality, they feel that they can control something. There is self-regulation. In the case of bulimia, the issue of distance from other people especially needs to be addressed. Eating too much is an attempt to replace relationship scarcity, and so developing new relationships through setting personal boundaries is usually the solution to this problem. Man no longer expresses his inner "I want this, I don't want this" by stuffing his stomach or rejecting food.
Postponement
Postponing undesirable things to an indefinite future is often the result of a lack of clear boundaries. People who constantly put off doing their jobs do not have a sense of choice, that is, they do not feel the need for it for themselves; their "no" is not a real "no". They say "yes" when they would like to say "no"; and later they still express their attitude through the failure to fulfill the promise. It's a distorted sense of control.
This is exactly what we see in the parable of the two sons (Matthew 21:28-31). The son who didn't keep his promise wasn't honest enough to say no. Instead, he said he was willing to work in his father's vineyard, and then he didn't. Another son said "no" for the first time, then changed his mind and went to work in the vineyard. This son was honest with his no, so he was honest with his yes later.
Impulsiveness
Impulsive people clearly have trouble setting personal boundaries. They have an underdeveloped internal structure. They act as they think at the moment; it indicates a limited ability to say "no" to oneself. When such people clearly set their boundaries and gain the necessary level of self-control to say “no” to themselves, they will be able to control their impulses.
Anxiety
Some people struggle with vague feelings of anxiety and tension, which are often the result of a lack of personal boundaries. Their poor internal structure makes them unable to recognize their feelings and resist the demands of the external environment. Often such people, when anxious, cannot point to a specific conflict or problem. Instead of working on a specific "problem", these people sometimes need to reinforce their awareness of who they are by establishing stronger personal boundaries. This will give them a greater sense of control over themselves and strengthen their ability to endure experiences. As a result, anxiety will decrease.
obsessive-compulsive behavior
People in this category are often preoccupied with an obsession or feeling that has no rational basis. They experience strong impulses to do rash acts. If these two symptoms are combined, then the struggle is with obsessive and uncontrolled impulses. For example, a man who feels he must wash his hands every hour exhibits obsessive-compulsive behavior. This person is obsessed with the fear of catching an infection and thinks that washing his hands will keep him from getting sick.
Setting boundaries is a fairly offensive, bold behavior. People who cannot set clear boundaries turn their aggression on themselves in the form of painful obsession or forcing others to do something to be safe. In this case, a person must make a decision by forming strong personal boundaries to get rid of these painful sensations. Establishing boundaries will form an internal structure with which he can resist intrusive thoughts and urges. This will restore to him self-control, whose function was performed by obsessive urges.
Obsessive urges reveal a lack of freedom. Developing boundaries and being able to say "no" gives a sense of freedom that is needed to deal with compulsive behavior.
OBSTACLES TO CREATING PERSONAL BORDERS
Trauma or distorted thinking can be a major barrier to creating boundaries. Below are some examples to illustrate how this happens.
Past trauma
We have all grown up in a world where ideas of where one person ends and another begins are mixed. As a result, we grew up not understanding what belongs to us and what does not, what we are responsible for and what is not.
This misunderstanding of our own limits culminates in not being allowed to own our own bodies, feelings, attitudes, actions, thoughts, abilities, decisions, desires, and limitations. As a result, we all carry a huge amount of emotional wounds, and our personal boundaries are violated. In addition, we ourselves get used to avoid responsibility for ourselves. We naturally we resist any responsibility, so when we are traumatized, we are almost unable to take responsibility for it.
Trauma usually occurs when someone does not allow us to take responsibility for our own lives. If, for example, our parents did not allow us to make our own decisions and made us responsible for their decisions. This causes serious damage to our personal boundaries. For example, Sandy grew up with a mother who had a strong influence on Sandy's ability to form personal boundaries. Sandy had to go through a process of standing up for what was hers and giving up what was her mother's, her choice and her responsibility.
Each person must find a specific moment in their past when the building of his or her personal boundaries stopped. Humiliation, control, and guilt manipulation are the greatest obstacles to setting boundaries. Also, if our boundaries are not fully developed due to the traumas of the past, we will be hurt more in the future. There is no doubt that Jesus, seeing the crowds of people, "felt compassion on them, because they were harassed and scattered, like sheep without a shepherd" (Matt. 9:36). God understands how lost we are and wants to help us rebuild our boundaries and regain the sense of freedom lost after the fall.
Distorted thinking
As a result of past traumas and failures, we have a distorted perception of God's reality. Distorted thinking is a serious obstacle to connecting with people, and it also needs to be corrected in order to take responsibility and establish personal boundaries. The following are just some examples of how people distort reality in relation to themselves, God, and other people.
Self-image
"I have boundaries, so I'm bad." The biggest problem with personal boundaries is the guilt that comes when we find ourselves completely free to take control of our lives. People are used to hearing that they are selfish and bad because they don't take responsibility for other people's feelings, actions, and choices. This view closes the circle of codependent behavior. People with personal boundary issues certainly feel they did something wrong if they tried to set limits and voice their desires. This is because they have an inflated sense of responsibility for other people. And the lack of freedom leads them to a sense of sinfulness, and again in a circle.
"I'm selfish if I want to control my life." People with similar attitudes have probably heard something like this more than once: "You are selfish if you do not give me what is yours." When a person is available for other people to control him, he feels that it is selfish to decide for himself what to do with his private property. In fact, making decisions for our lives is the only true proof of love, because then everything that we give to other people will be given freely.
"My needs are not that important." This statement is a self-denial and is not of biblical origin. Yes, the Bible says we must deny ourselves, but we can do so if we first own what we are about to reject. People who do not own their lives cannot give it away because they have nothing to give! We must be good custodians of our lives so that we have the opportunity to renounce them.
"My needs are the most important." This is distortion in the other direction. When we don't have personal boundaries, we tend to overstep other people's lives and not see them as separate individuals. The true essence of selfishness is the denial of the needs and feelings of others.
"I must have everything I want." This distortion of our "I" has devastating consequences, because it deprives us of control over our own lives. Limiting our own desires allows us to serve others, and at the same time be at a proper distance without merging with them. Not satisfying all our needs is sometimes very good for us; it sets the boundaries. When we say "no" to certain demands of children, they learn to restrain themselves.
"I am responsible for others people." This belief keeps people in a state of immaturity. The truth is that we must be responsible before others, not behind them. We have obligations to those in need; however, we must demand responsibility from strong and robust people. By not doing this, we give them the opportunity to remain spiritually immature.
"If something goes wrong, it's my fault." People With problems of personal boundaries have an excessive sense of guilt. They feel responsible, for example, if someone crashes into their house and ends up in the hospital. They feel responsible if they can make any connection between their behavior and the behavior of another person. They often blame themselves for the actions of others.
Parents often blame themselves all their lives for the mistakes of their children. They deny the fact that all people are responsible for themselves. Such attitudes of parents lead to the fact that children grow up helpless. And parents then say that children do not have enough strength to deal with the difficulties of life. Of course, after all, all the power remained with the parents.
"I'm not guilty of anything." Such a statement shows a complete lack of responsibility for what a person does. It reveals a non-recognition of what is within our private property and a non-acceptance of responsibility for our actions. The typical behavior of such people is blaming others, while they do not admit their participation in causing pain to another person. Some parents do not admit their involvement in the problems of children, which is as wrong as taking all the blame. In fact, we can cause another person to sin (Matt. 18:6).
Naked representation of others
"They will hate me if I say no." If we are used to being responsible for the disappointments of other people, we begin to fear resentment and hatred in those cases when we dare to defend our interests, that is, what belongs to us. We feel that people will reject us if we set limits on what to do and what not to do for them. In fact, research and life experience show that people who can say "no" like others much more.
"I will be abandoned if I defend my personal boundaries." Sometimes when children begin to take over their own lives and create a separate "I", they lose the love of their parents. If this happens in childhood, then a trace will forever remain in the heart, and a person will always expect to be left when he begins to control himself. But in reality, everything happens just the opposite. People without personal boundaries remain abandoned much more often.
"People want to control and manipulate me." People who do not have a developed sense of self are afraid of being manipulated and controlled by other people. They always look for moments when others try to control them, and therefore are afraid to enter into intimate relationships. Good boundaries give a person the necessary inner strength, in which it becomes impossible to manipulate or control him.
"Others will refuse to comply with my requests." Some people have been brought up with the notion that direct expression of desire is unworthy or selfish. They have learned to be passive about their desires out of fear of rejection and judgment. They are always afraid to look too demanding in the eyes of those they love. Although, on the contrary, direct and honest people have more attachments and a wider range of relationships. It is very difficult to get close to a passive person, because you will always have to guess what he really wants.
"People will leave me if I don't make them happy." People who are accustomed to being responsible for the feelings of others are afraid that they will lose a loved one if they do not take responsibility for his or her happiness. They probably lost someone for this reason, but it is a misrepresentation to judge everyone based on this bad experience.
"Others are responsible for me." Both our responsibility for others and their responsibility for us is a distortion. Thinking that others are responsible for us, we also cross the boundaries of others. By shifting responsibility for our feelings, attitudes and decisions, we seem to forget that these people have their own life, and they are free to do whatever they want with it.
"People are selfish because they don't fulfill my desires." We may not understand how our distorted view of boundaries affects others if we judge them for freedom. We don't accept their right to say no.
"People don't like me if they tell me no." If we are torn between love and limitations, we often take other people's "no" as rejection and proof of their dislike of us. This is a lack of respect for people and a distorted view of them, because people have the right to decide for themselves how to prove their love to us. We tend to see them as cruel if they have personal boundaries.
"People expect me to fulfill their wishes." Often we do not realize how much freedom and the ability to own our own lives give us. If we grew up in a controlled environment, we expect others to not give us personal freedom either.
"Others are responsible for my actions." If others have always been responsible for us, we will continue to assume that someone else is responsible for our behavior and its consequences. This is a misunderstanding of the law of causation in our lives, and the consequence of this misunderstanding is that we will always wait for someone to vouch for us. One secretary I knew put the following sign on her table: "Your poor planning is not a reason for my haste." In essence, she meant to say that she was not responsible for the behavior of other people.
Our concept of God
"God doesn't want me to own my life." Many people with personal boundary issues think that God's command to deny ourselves and give our lives to Him means that we no longer have the right to own our lives. This is not true. Necessary to own your own life so that you can give it to God, because you cannot give what you do not own. The Bible and life experience show us that we must be aware of all of the above components of our personality in order to freely submit to God.
God wants to have fellowship with us, and fellowship requires at least two persons. When Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemane, He submitted to the will of the Father, but He was also clearly aware of His own desires: "Father, let this cup pass from Me." This was His desire, which He later subordinated to the will of the Father. Jesus was in control of His desires and spoke them out. All the great saints of the Bible, including Job, David, Paul, had a similar relationship with God. They freely expressed their desires to God. God wants us to be real people and own what is ours. Only then can we freely give it to Him.
"God wants me to have everything I want." There are people who believe that the fulfillment of their desires is the commandment of God, and He has no restrictions on this. The idea is as unbiblical as the previous one. God often says "no" to us, and He doesn't have to explain anything to us. In the parable of the vineyard workers, the owner was free to do what he saw fit because it was his right (Matt. 20:15). The "welfare gospel" presents God as our servant and denies His boundaries and choices. God often says "no" for reasons we don't understand; His refusal to fulfill our desires does not mean that we lacked faith. Ask Jesus if He had enough faith in the Garden of Gethsemane.
"God thinks I'm selfish if I say no to others." God loves us and gives us blessings out of His freedom, not compulsion. The other side of free giving is the ability to say "no" when we don't want to give. God keeps us aware of boundaries because He created them. As a result, we will be able to give voluntarily and not out of compulsion.
In addition, we help God bring people to maturity when we say "no" to their irresponsibility. Paul says, "If anyone does not listen to our word in this epistle, keep him under observation and do not associate with him to put him to shame; but do not regard him as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother" (2 Thessalonians 3:14, 15). When we say no to offensive or sinful behavior, we become God's hand that He teaches to anyone. We help people recognize their own limits.
"God wants me to let others do whatever they see fit with me and with other people." This is the same misconception as the previous ones. God tells us many times that we can rebuke others (Matt. 18:15-18; Lev. 19:17; Prov. 27:5,6; Eph. 4:25,26; 1 Cor. 5:9,13 ; Gal. 6:1,2; 2 Cor. 2:5-11; 1 Cor. 5:1-5). If we do not do this, we are manifesting grace without truth. This makes it possible for other people to remain immature. God is very serious in saying that we must grow in Him. He does not want us to help others remain immature.
"God doesn't want me to get what I want." Many people feel guilty about owning their own talents and goals. God created us with talents and He wants us to use them. in the best possible way. We must make plans, but we must also always be ready for God to challenge them. "A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord guides his way" (Proverbs 16:9). "Rejoice in the Lord, and He will fulfill the desire of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, and trust in Him, and He will accomplish, and bring out, as a light, your righteousness, and your justice as noon" (Ps. 36:4-6) .
"God is completely independent and in control of everything; therefore I have no responsibility." Thus, our right to own our own lives is denied. God has given us great responsibility and freedom to organize our lives; he even limits His "domains" so that we can have our own will and make our own choices. He did not create robots that would do whatever He commanded. We are responsible for our decisions and one day we will give an account for them. Therefore, we will have to say a lot of "no" throughout our lives.
"God is not involved in my life." This denies God's right to own our lives. God is very active in our spiritual growth. Both God and ourselves are responsible for our growth. "Work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for God is working in you both to will and to do according to His own pleasure" (Philippians 2:12,13). We are God's co-workers in our growth.
"If God says no to me, He doesn't love me." God is free to limit His giving, and He does it at His own discretion for our good. When He says "no", it is not a manifestation of His dislike, as it serves our good. He knows that sometimes we want to heal ourselves instead of letting Him do it for us. For example, if I'm depressed because I don't have relationships with people, for God to "heal" me from depression means to let me know that I have to learn to connect with other people and love. He can tell me "no" to my prayers to heal my depression for my own good. We, like Job, must trust God when He says no and trust His timing. This does not mean that He does not love us. This may mean that He wants something better for us.
"God – this is a forgiving God, and He will not punish me for my sins." This statement denies God's limitations. God will not let evil take over us. He wants to keep the house clean, and because He invited us to live with Him, He wants us to take off our shoes if they are dirty. He will punish us for our own good. He is interested in developing our righteousness because it is not good for us to remain immature and imperfect.
"God – it's just limitations and no love." God has a lot of compassion and even more forgiveness, and we must allow Him to show them. To see in Him only the Punisher, without compassion, is to reject His nature.
The term "responsible person" has become quite popular in our time. It can be observed even in job advertisements as a mandatory requirement for a candidate. As a property of a person, the word "responsibility" cannot be found even in large explanatory dictionaries. However, many people have their own opinions regarding its meaning. The characteristic of a responsible person is a very subjective concept. Let's see what responsibility is.
Responsibility is the ability and willingness of an individual to invest his time, money, or part of his freedom to achieve a certain goal. In some cases, the term may also include the ability to be punished for one's actions. In such situations, responsibility implies a certain justice of the individual in how he treats himself. The person agrees that his actions deserve some reproach, and is ready to bear responsibility for them.
This term is quite ancient, it is found in many languages. Interestingly, in all cases it is associated with the ability to react or respond to something, and is also associated with a certain punishment. Initially, punishment was a quite tangible concept. For example, murder was punished by some compensation for moral and material damage.
Today sense of responsibility is more associated with the ability of a person to keep a given word, as well as to make decisions in which a person acts not only in his own interests. The concept of responsibility is much broader than the term "obligation". However, the second is an integral part of the first.
Responsibility takes place only when there is a relationship between two or more people. That is, such a thing as responsibility does not exist outside of society. At the same time, when it comes to the fact that a person responsibly does something specifically for himself, it still means a personal quality formed in society. There is a clear direct relationship between the closeness of a person's connection with other people and the likelihood that a person will be responsible. For this quality to be formed, you need the experience of responsible relationships and a developed activity reflection. Therefore, this property can only be in a really acting person.
Responsibility, like self-criticism, an essential quality that any leader should have. Nevertheless, in our time, an incorrect attitude towards the concept of a leader has been formed. Everywhere and everywhere the idea is propagated that each person should strive to be ahead of or at the head of any group of people. Unfortunately, such propaganda is a trap for responsible people who lack the skills and inclinations of management. Because of this, they have to suffer and lose their health, doing a business that, in fact, is not their path. This is especially true for young men, who at an early age earn a number of diseases, experiencing severe stress at work.
Thus, liability is social concept, and it is supported by some actions. At the same time, the measure of responsibility should be formed by each individual specifically for himself, with an eye to his capabilities.
How to become a responsible person
Responsibility is a skill that can be acquired with some effort. To understand how to become more responsible, it is necessary to consider the existing levels of assessment of this quality. Ask someone you know to analyze you according to the criteria below. Often, after such an assessment, many questions arise, the answers to which will be useful. Since it is not easy to become responsible right away, an external independent look will be very valuable, which will be discussed below.
Levels of personal responsibility
- Zero liability implies that you are playing the role of a dependent. You completely disclaim any responsibility because you think that someone's concern for you is a self-evident duty. Such a person does not think about how to become more responsible, because he is comfortable in his current position.
- The first level puts you in the position of a performer. Such a person practices the principle "work is not a wolf." Usually such people do nothing until they are told to do something. If the performer is not pushed to take some action, then he will still be at the starting point.
- The second level of responsibility implies that a person takes the position of a specialist. Such people do their work qualitatively, but at the same time they do not put their soul into it. They see their job as a way to earn money and nothing more. You should not expect any initiative from such a person. Such people are not interested in helping or suggesting something. You need to understand that a specialist can leave you at any time if he finds a more profitable occupation. Such people quite often use the phrase "I'm not paid for this", thereby limiting themselves from activities that are not included in the list of their powers.
- The third level is occupied by the responsible employee. Even if such a person does not perform his functions with sufficient quality at the moment, he strives to develop and acquire the necessary skills. Therefore, in the future, a responsible employee will certainly become a professional in his field. The results of his work are important to him, he is quite initiative and open to the exchange of experience. Such a person treats his occupation with interest. He considers his employer's business as his own. Each employee who works with him shoulder to shoulder is perceived by him as a member of the family. A responsible employee never says, "I'm not getting paid for this." When he is entrusted with some business, he does it, and then talks with his superiors about how this work should be paid for both him and his colleagues.
- The fourth level of responsibility is occupied by the local manager. Such a person is a manager who organizes the work of subordinates to achieve their goals. This person takes responsibility for himself and for others. He is not afraid to give orders and make serious decisions, on the correctness of which the fate of many depends. The local leader loves work less because he has to delegate it to his wards, who make it worse than he is. However, it is more correct to entrust it to employees, and not to do it yourself. The local manager organizes the work process in the area entrusted to him.
- The fifth level is for the director, who supervises the lower level bosses. This person is responsible for the business as a whole, while placing tactical decisions in the hands of his wards. It remains for him to formulate a strategy. A person of this level is able to open new directions or close existing ones. He is a professional who makes serious decisions. However, the level of his responsibility is limited solely to the salary received and the prestigious position.
- The sixth level of responsibility is peculiar only to the business owner. It is this person who organizes the business in which he invests his money, time and soul. He is able to be responsible for the result of his actions not only with finances, but also with life. The owner considers his own business as his child, whom he raised for many years. He selects a director who can effectively manage his business, but at any time he can replace him with another. Interestingly, the owner of a large company rarely lights up in public. He is a kind of neck of the CEO, which directs the latter in the right direction. The business owner does not ask himself the question: “How to become a responsible person?”. He is responsible by definition, since the well-being of the whole staff of employees and his own financial condition depend on him.
Do not consider the above levels as positions. They represent levels of personal development. For example, a person who holds the position of director of a large enterprise, from the personal-psychological side, can be an ordinary specialist or performer. At the same time, his secretary, psychologically, may well turn out to be the owner. Often there are men who at work manifest themselves as effective leaders, and at home they turn into dependents or performers. It is not uncommon for women housewives to take full responsibility, choosing for themselves the role of the owner of the family. At the same time, they raise their husband as the head of the family.
Raising a sense of responsibility is to teach yourself to see your obligations, as well as to be able to fulfill them and pay for the consequences. Moreover, the payment can be expressed in time or in money. You must be able to pay for your own mistakes even when you don't want to.
Since it is not easy to develop responsibility right away, you can perform the following tasks to acquire this quality:
- First of all, you need to make responsibility one of your values. You need to realize that this quality is a very important social skill that gives you a chance to noticeably improve your life. Development of responsibility personality is a process that requires only your desire. You should have a desire to cultivate this quality in yourself. Take responsibility for your family life. Then you can realize, for example, that the author of any resentment that arises in a relationship is only you.
- You can practice developing personal responsibility by asking yourself questions about what you can do now and what options you have. It is very helpful to replace "I want" requests with questions about what needs to be done in order to get what I want.
- You can develop responsibility by asking yourself more often: “What should I do to be fully responsible for my actions?”
- Since developing a sense of responsibility alone is not always easy, you can choose your mentor(partner) who will encourage and penalize you if necessary. It is better to select a person who can adequately assess your development and control your life. The partner will motivate you to follow a certain labor discipline, without postponing any tasks for later.
- It will not be superfluous to send reports on your development to your partner remotely at regular intervals. It is enough to do this 2 times a week. You can come up with penalties for non-compliance with deadlines and methods of rewarding for a responsible approach to this issue. By doing this for twenty-one days, you will be able to develop a good habit to some extent.
Now you know what it means to be a responsible person. With effort, you will soon notice certain changes in your life. The development of personal responsibility according to the above scenario will allow us to see good results in the near future.
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Among your acquaintances, there are probably those: with half-drooped shoulders, an eternally hunched back and a guilty expression on their faces. It seems that they have a heavy invisible backpack attached to their back, tightening their muscles so much that even a smile turns out to be crooked. This is understandable! If you look in a backpack, you will not find anything there: responsibility for work, country, natural disasters, oil prices. When you pull the whole Universe on yourself, you will inevitably make a mistake somewhere. But seriously?
Be always responsible for yourself, because no one will take responsibility for you.
Tyra Banks
Causes of hyperresponsibility
Is it bad to be a person responsible for your actions and words? On the contrary, it's wonderful. Responsibility is an indicator of true, not passport adulthood. Must - means must! Said - done. These people make up the golden fund of irreplaceable professionals and inspired family men.To work with such a person calmly and reliably: he will always do everything on time, and he will lend a shoulder to others. He better not sleep an extra hour, but his native workshop will not let you down! A person with a heightened sense of responsibility will obviously not turn family life into a dump: conscience torments! He will bring potatoes from the market in two hands, so as not to deprive his relatives. He will not go with friends to nature, although he has been going since the winter, because there is no one to sit with the son of his cousin's niece. And, if this abstract person is also distinguished by great patience and a balanced disposition, it is a pleasure for those around him!
You don't have to worry about the outcome of the case at all! Everything will be on top. Because a hyper-responsible comrade will work for himself and for that guy. But is it easy for him?
Does it carry its own burden?
Who does not know the Russian proverb “Your burden does not pull”, which has analogues in other languages. There is hardly much positive in the burden that pulls the shoulders and slows down the movement. But if you carry it because it is yours, necessary for you or your loved ones, like air, like sunlight, like breathing, the burden automatically becomes weightless. And it becomes joyful to carry, according to one's strength. And if it’s sad and hard, maybe you got excited and took on what doesn’t belong to you, and even too much?Where do the lines of responsibility end?
Trying to live for others their lives is a thankless and useless business. You can't get your overgrown offspring off the couch and find a high-paying job if all his body movements are limited to lazy switching of TV channels. You are exhausted by anxiety adult daughter, which meets married man but she seems to be fine with it.Yes, it hurts and hurts, but this is her life. You understand that the husband with his talents obviously should have received the position of head of the department, but it happened differently, but he does not protest. And what can you change? At best, make a scandal, and even then not to the boss. Yes, parents get old, and the feeling of guilt for what was said and not done strangles with a prickly scarf so that it is impossible to just fall asleep peacefully.
Maybe these nightly vigils will somehow reduce anxiety? Hardly! But insomnia earn twice two. And the weather on the eve of the weekend so unexpectedly spoiled the plans, so everyone goes gloomy. But aren't you happy too? Why do you think you should take on the role of the house clown?
Comes from childhood: hyperresponsibility in a child
Where did this debilitating desire to be responsible for the “rising and setting of the sun” come from? Everyone is different. But I will not be mistaken if I say that usually even in childhood, fueled by the ambitious desires of the parents, the child strove to be correct and responsible, doing everything “from and to”.Family circumstances have put a heavy burden on someone's back - to be a parent for their infantile dads and moms. So the young poor fellow had to reconcile his noisy "children", exhort, listen, regret and grow up beyond his years. But you never know what were the difficult life stories? Yes, only childhood has passed, but the need to drag the Universe on itself with the last of its strength remains.
Consequences: Why is hyperresponsibility dangerous?
It seems that hyper-responsible people are ready to solve all problems, except for those that need to be taken on first and second.These are situations and problems of one's own life related to health, professional and personal development, mood and self-understanding. Refusal to realize one's interests and needs is a spiritual desertion, which will definitely make itself felt with treacherous ailments and a feeling of inner emptiness. One morning, looking in the mirror, you can just see a tired look stranger. And you have nothing to say to him.
Difficult but important step
You need to understand that it is normal to experience difficulties, problems and even the desire to “send everything to hell” from time to time. Not enough straw to protect our dear people from harm. Yes, and we are just people: ordinary mortals with a limited supply of time on earth. We don't have the gift of foresight. And even if he were, the other person has the right to act in his own way just because he is different. The choice of loved ones can surprise, upset, and even shock. But, we must admit: they have a right to it.Treatment, or how to get rid of hyperresponsibility
When we take responsibility for other people, we assume that they are not smart enough, experienced enough to solve their problem. But after all, this can only be in one case: if a person is not fully capable due to his young or old age, and also because of some ailments. If this is not the case, transfer responsibility for your life to their owners.Do not cultivate pride that whispers to you about omnipotence. Just open up your heavy bag and start handing out what you never owned. Yes, there will be a storm of indignation, resentment and claims. You will be accused of selfishness and indifference. But you know for sure that to help a person take responsibility for their actions and even thoughts - this is love. By the way, this concerns you in the first place.
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