Orthodox wedding rules. What you need to know for those who are going to get married in a church

A wedding in the Orthodox Church is one of the seven main sacraments, and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. Wedding along with baptism, chrismation, repentance, communion, priesthood and unction constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of a person's entry into church life. Everything that the bride and groom need to know before such a responsible step as a wedding, you will read in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament but want to learn more about it.

The meaning of wedding in the Orthodox Church

According to the Christian worldview, two people unite in a God-sanctified union and become one flesh. That is why divorces, so common today in a Christian environment, are considered an unnatural phenomenon, as if a mother decided not to live with her child. Sometimes such a gap is associated with the amputation of a limb or organ - a painful process that makes a person inferior.

The Lord created Adam and Eve and blessed them to multiply and fruit the earth. Adam immediately recognized spiritual and physical kinship with his wife: the first thing when he saw Eve, he called her his flesh and blood, because he loved her:

“And the man said, Behold, this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of [her] husband” (Gen. 2:23).

Therefore, before taking this step, people should be aware of the seriousness that they promise God by this act.

Young love, as well as long-awaited love, is characterized by haste and a vision of your partner in “pink” colors. The virtues that any person has - since everyone is created in the image of God and inherited perfect features from Him - loving person perceives exaggeratedly and it seems to him that the object of love is perfect. At the same time, its shortcomings - which everyone also has, since we have all been subjected to original sin and its consequences in the form of illness, death and passions - seem to be smoothed out and not amenable to rational analysis.

Therefore, in the temple, where the young people came to talk with the priest about the upcoming event, one can meet an unexpected reaction from the church minister. So, if the priest observes the charter of the holy fathers and honors traditions, then he will advise the lovers to wait at least a year before the wedding, during which you can get to know the person better in different circumstances and experience their feelings in practice.

At the same time, this year is not blessed to live an intimate life. In the case when the young people came after the established relationship and put the priest before the fact, he explains to them that early sexual intimacy before legal marriage leads to adverse consequences for further relationships and their strength.

After an explanatory conversation, if the young people realized their guilt, the priest invites them to fast for three days, then confess their sins and take communion. On the eve of the wedding, the newlyweds must take communion in order to feel this day as the most important in life - the day when two destinies become one destiny, two souls become one soul and two bodies become one body.

How to prepare for the wedding?

First you need to choose a day, a place for the wedding and notify the priest in advance. At the same time, it must be remembered that this sacrament is not allowed to be performed in the Orthodox Church every day of the year.

The sacrament of the wedding is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays, since these days precede the fasts that believers observe on Wednesday and Friday. Also, the sacrament is not performed on Saturday, since Sunday (and the church day begins at 20:00 the day before) is a small Easter, a consecrated day.

Also, you can’t get married on the days of the fasts established by the Ecumenical Councils - these are 4 fasts a year with a total duration of 5-6 months with different intervals.

As a rule, an age-old tradition of weddings on Krasnaya Gorka has been established in the Orthodox Church of Russia - this is the name of the holiday on the first Sunday after Easter. This day is called church calendar Anti-Easter and marks the beginning of the period of nationwide wedding festivities, which took place en masse in Rus' at all times.

The sacrament is also not performed on the eve of single fasting days - for example, on September 11 on the feast of the Beheading of John the Baptist; on special days of joy and celebration after the Great and Nativity fasts - at Christmas time and Bright Week; before and during the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross.

After choosing a day, it is necessary to start preparing, which, first of all, does not include the external preparation of individual items, inviting guests and a plan of events for the celebration - but the internal state of the newlyweds, which consists in preparing for the sacrament of Confession and. Both sacraments necessarily precede such an important event. After all, the Lord calls the Kingdom of Heaven a wedding feast, and Communion at such a feast on the day of marriage is the communion of God's love and strengthening for the entire future joint path through life.

The priest appoints the time of the wedding immediately after the liturgy, which is held every morning. Ideally, if the newlyweds manage to defend the liturgy and take communion on it immediately on the eve of the celebration. After all, it is much more important to spend your strength on contributing to the sacrament than to save it for evening festivities (which it is desirable to avoid and leave guests as early as possible for solitude).

What do you need to get married in a church?

The rules for preparing for a wedding in the Orthodox Church are mainly in the internal awareness and responsibility for this step. In the understanding that there is no way back and all the difficulties of character, adjustments, disagreements - can now not be a reason for terminating the union that God has sanctified.

This is a serious step, but many today take it lightly, not counting on the strength and strength of feelings. Unfortunately, such people do not understand that after the breakup of a married union, it will be more difficult to make the next family harmonious and you should take care of what you have.

And already in the second place, it is necessary to prepare an outfit, documents, items for the sacrament and other things necessary on this day.

What you need for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, the list:

Certificate of registration of marriage. According to the rules established by the Holy Synod, marriages not registered with the registry office cannot be married. Such conditions are dictated primarily by the seriousness of the intentions of the newlyweds, because after the revolution and the collapse Russian Empire the church has lost the authority to influence the rights and obligations of the parties, the function of regulating legal relations is now performed by the registry office.
Icons of the Savior and the Mother of God. What icons are needed for a wedding? Any images and salaries will do, but the main thing is that they can be picked up without any problems. This pious tradition used to mean the blessing of parents on marriage and was inherited - from the side of the bride, an icon Holy Mother of God, and from the side of the groom, the icon of the Savior. The blessing of the parents had sacred value and was sacredly observed.
Golden wedding rings. Previously, a woman's wedding ring was silver, reminding that in a Christian family a woman is an assistant to her husband and submits to a loving spouse. The husband had a golden ring, which corresponded to the symbolism of the royal metal - like Christ, the husband is obliged to love his wife, who symbolizes the Church. It is the husband who will be responsible for his family before God at the Judgment.
Wedding candles. They can be purchased locally at the temple. They are a symbol of the grace of the Holy Spirit, which invisibly stands and sanctifies.
White board. It can be either an ordinary white towel purchased, or a linen hand-embroidered by the bride (which was often practiced before). Can also be purchased locally at the Temple. He is laid on the floor and gets up during a certain moment in the process of the sacrament. Plath symbolizes the purity of the thoughts and aspirations of those who are getting married.
Some temples have a fixed amount of donations for the sacrament. The cost must be paid before the sacrament, so as not to forget about it after. If there is no fixed fee, then you can leave a voluntary donation after the wedding. It should be remembered that the state does not provide church workers with salaries and their living depends on our donations.
Worthy appearance of those who are getting married. The girl (woman) should have a headdress (a scarf or a more magnificent wedding veil), closed shoulders, the outfit should be modest, covering the knees and not having a deep neckline. The man must be in trousers. Shorts, breeches and other cropped options that expose the legs are not allowed for a man in the temple. The color of the outfit for the bride is better to choose light, pastel colors. Traditionally, a pure chaste girl emphasizes her innocence with a completely white dress and fresh flowers in her hands. It is better to choose shoes for the bride that are comfortable, with flat soles, in order to defend the service without any problems.

After the church has lost its legitimate civil power to regulate legal matters, the presence of witnesses is not mandatory and is more of a pious tradition. The witnesses were the guarantors of the spouses, they knew them well. Experienced witnesses with their own families were invited, who in difficult situations could give practical advice.

What rules of wedding in the Orthodox Church do you need to know?

How to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church - the priest who was chosen by the newlyweds to conduct their sacrament will explain in an accessible way. But general rules remain the same.

A marriage registered by the registry office is a graceless, but not lawless cohabitation. This form is respected by the church and is allowed in the case when a church marriage cannot be performed. And it cannot be done in several cases:

when a civil marriage has been registered more than three times - according to church canons, one cannot marry more than three times;
when one or both spouses do not belong to the Orthodox Church, are not baptized or are not brought voluntarily;
when there was no actual dissolution of the marriage with the previous spouse: for civil registration, a certificate of divorce is required, for church registration - the blessing of the bishop for entering into a new marriage;
when the bride and groom are in blood or spiritual relationship - including if they are godparents of one person;
the rules for the age of those getting married in the Orthodox Church are limited to the upper threshold of 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, the lower threshold is 16 years for a girl and 18 for a guy.

During the preparation for the wedding, all controversial points in matters of worldview should be spoken out so that the sacrament is performed with a pure heart.

How long does the wedding in the church take - 40-60 minutes.

What to do with wedding candles and other attributes after the wedding?

From such family heirlooms, you can arrange a small collection. For this purpose, they start a separate box, where they put the attributes after the wedding, baptism and other memorable family events. The box can be shown to children, highlighting the details of a significant day in front of them, refreshing their own memory and plunging into memories of happy events. There you can also put various souvenirs brought from the pilgrimage.

Wedding candles can be lit during prayer to ask God for something important for the family, for special gratitude to Him, or at other times.

All these things are reminders of important milestones in the development of the family and are part of the emotional life of family members. At the same time, they do not carry sacred value by themselves. If for some reason the relics were not needed, they can be eliminated in a special way. Since the objects participated in the holy rite, it is better to burn them - on your own or transfer them to the church with a request to dispose of the consecrated candles and objects that participated in the sacrament.

Seeing wedding symbols in front of them, spouses can, through memories, find ways in mutual understanding when difficult moments arise, through tangible evidence of their union, which they entered into before God, spouses remember the importance of the family hearth and draw new strength to walk through life together hand in hand. hand.

The wedding rules in the Orthodox Church consist, first of all, of a moral basis, which consists in purity of intentions, the absence of selfish and dishonorable goals, and a firm determination to unite with a loved one together. The purpose of such a union is to receive from the Lord the gift of unanimity for the Christian life and the upbringing of children. You can learn more about the wedding from the book.

You have already decided that you want to connect your fate with your loved one by getting married in a church. and the Department for External Church Relations of the Moscow Patriarchate. offer to learn more about how and under what conditions a wedding is performed, and what is needed for this.

In Russia, they crown in the same way as they “paint” from the age of 18

1. The very first and most important thing is that both those who are getting married must be baptized Orthodox Christians. If it turns out that the situation with baptism is not clear - for example, a person does not remember whether he was baptized or not, then you need to come to the temple in advance and discuss this with the priest, preferably at least a month before the expected date of the wedding. In some cases, marriage with non-Orthodox Christians (Catholics, Anglicans, Lutherans, etc.) is allowed, but on the condition that the children born in this marriage will be baptized in Orthodoxy.

2. They do not marry if at least one of the newlyweds professes a non-Christian religion (Muslim, Judaism, Buddhism, etc.).

3. The sacrament of the wedding is performed only after registration with the registry office, however, if there are any circumstances that interfere with this, for example, problems with the documents of one of the future spouses, then you can always be met. To do this, you need to go to the temple in advance and consult with the priest.

4. During the fasts do not get married. This is important to consider when setting a wedding date, because fasting, as you know, involves abstinence not only in food, but also in bodily intimacy, the first wedding night in fasting is not blessed. The dates of fasting days can be found on the website www.pravoslavie.ru.

5. It is forbidden to marry persons who are in close degrees of kinship.

6. IN Orthodox Church it is allowed to get married three times in a lifetime if a person was widowed while being married, or the previous marriage was dissolved in accordance with church rules.

7. They do not marry if the bride or groom is actually married to another person. Civil marriage must be dissolved in in due course, and if the previous marriage was church, then the permission of the bishop is necessary for its dissolution and blessing for entering into a new marriage.

The sacrament of the wedding is performed only after registration in the registry office

8. The age of those getting married is limited by local laws - in Russia they get married in the same way as they “paint” from the age of 18.

9. At the wedding, everyone who the newlyweds want to see at the same time can be present. There are no restrictions.

10. A wedding can be held on the same day as a trip to the registry office, but usually this is not done, since it is simply difficult for young people and their guests to withstand such a load.

11. The clothes of those who are getting married should, of course, be smart, the bride's dress can be of any color, traditionally light colors. It is desirable that there are sleeves, a closed back, but if the dress is sleeveless, then you can use a cape on the shoulders.

12. At the wedding, it is allowed to conduct video and photography, only the priest must be warned about this in advance.

13. Before you take such a responsible step as a wedding, it would be good to confess. Confession is usually made during the evening service on Saturdays and before Orthodox holidays or during the morning service, respectively, on Sundays and holidays.

14. If the wedding donation is too big for you, then you can always explain the situation to the priest and donate as much money as you can

15. And most importantly: if you have any specific questions of a domestic, organizational or personal nature, you should discuss them exclusively with the priest, but not with the saleswomen in the candle shop, active grandmothers in the temple or the church watchman.

Text: Alexandra Borisova, Department for External Church Relations of the Moscow Patriarchate

Orthodox wedding is a centuries-old tradition that arose long before the appearance of the marriage registration procedure in the registry office. The wedding ceremony refers to the seven sacraments through which the grace of the Holy Spirit is transmitted in an invisible way to a person. A wedding in the Orthodox Church unites the young in love and fidelity in the face of God, thus personifying marriage in the form of a certain sacrament related to spiritual being.

A wedding is a church service held according to a certain order or order, during which the sacrament of marriage is consecrated. Today, the wedding ceremony is a fashionable "event", so many newlyweds take this step only because of the exciting and impressive beauty of the action itself, without thinking that this is not a mere formality. Meanwhile, the wedding is a sacred sacrament, which should be performed only on those who really believe and wish to forever seal their union not only on earth, but also in heaven. Therefore, the decision to marry should be mutual, conscious and well thought out, since it is not easy to dissolve a church marriage without incurring the wrath of God.

Most often, the newlyweds go to the Orthodox wedding ceremony immediately after registering the marriage in the registry office. However, this is not the rule. It is possible, for example, to carry out the sacred sacrament on the day of the wedding anniversary. basis christian church is a family where the dominant role is given to the husband, who must selflessly love his wife, who, in turn, is obliged to obey her husband of her own free will. It is the husband, in the opinion of the church, who is obliged to maintain the connection of the family with the Church of Christ. The rite of dethronement can be carried out in case of adultery, and only the ruling Bishop of the diocese is given the right to grant permission for church divorce.

The Orthodox wedding ceremony is performed in the church in front of the lectern, where the cross and the Gospel lie. The sacrament itself is performed in two stages: first the betrothal follows, and then the wedding itself. During the ceremony, the bride and groom make a promise of mutual fidelity, and their union is blessed in the image of the spiritual union of Christ with the Church and the grace of God is asked for mutual help and unanimity, and for the birth and Christian upbringing of children. Only those who have received the sacrament of baptism are allowed to perform the rite of an Orthodox wedding. In this regard, both the newlyweds and all witnesses of the wedding must be baptized and wear pectoral crosses. In addition, the wedding ceremony can be performed provided that the husband is already 18 years old, and the wife is 16 years old.

The wedding ceremony requires special preparation: choose a church, choose a date from the wedding calendar, familiarize yourself with the canons of an Orthodox wedding, purchase a wedding dress. Choosing a wedding venue is a crucial moment. The determining factor in choosing a temple should be the feelings of the bride and groom. In the chosen church, they should be easy and calm. Two or three weeks before the Orthodox wedding, the newlyweds should visit the chosen temple and get acquainted with the rules of this sacred sacrament.

Other milestone preparation for the Orthodox wedding is the choice of date. The most suitable time for a wedding in the fall is the period after the Feast of the Intercession, in winter it is better - the period from Epiphany to Shrovetide, in the summer - the period between Petrov and Assumption posts, in the spring - on Krasnaya Gorka. It should be noted that the wedding ceremony is not performed on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, on the eve of temple and great holidays, during fasting, during Christmas time, during Shrovetide, Easter (Bright) week, on the days (and on the eve) of the Beheading of John the Baptist, and the Exaltation of the Holy Cross. According to popular beliefs, it is not recommended to marry on Wednesday and Friday, as well as on the 13th.

The wedding ceremony cannot be performed if this is already the fourth marriage for one of the spouses, if this is a marriage between blood relatives up to the fourth generation, and also if the marriage is concluded between people suffering from mental disorders. In addition, the Orthodox wedding ceremony cannot be performed if the newlyweds are representatives of another religion or atheists. According to tradition, in order to perform an Orthodox wedding, newlyweds must have a parental blessing, although in practice its absence does not prevent the celebration of the sacred sacrament. The presence of pregnancy is also not an obstacle to the implementation of the wedding ceremony. The wedding cannot take place if one of the future spouses has an undissolved marriage with another person. In addition, the church does not approve of unions between godparents and godchildren.

The wedding ceremony is performed by a priest. If you want to capture the Orthodox wedding ceremony in a photo or video, you should discuss all the details with the priest of the church in advance.

Having decided on the time and date of the wedding, the newlyweds must coordinate it with the priest, since pre-registration is now practiced in many churches. You should take a marriage registration certificate with you to the wedding. A couple of days before the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds need to attend a divine service, come to confession in the morning and take communion the day before. In addition, before the ceremony, fasting should be observed for 3-7 days (refuse alcohol, do not smoke, do not eat meat, and also refrain from marital relations before the wedding). The bride at the wedding must have a headdress (veil or scarf), arms, shoulders and neckline should be covered as much as possible (you should take care of the cape). The bride's makeup should be discreet, in addition, perfumes with a pronounced smell should not be used. The wedding bouquet will have to be held by one of those present, since the newlywed's hands will be busy, she will hold a candle.

The wedding ceremony lasts about forty minutes, so it is better if the bride puts on comfortable closed shoes with small heels. The wedding ceremony requires certain restrictions in the appearance of the bride, so it is recommended to refuse tight-fitting and short, as well as luxurious and lush dresses. The wedding dress must be white and speak of the modesty and meekness of the bride, and it must also have a long train, which can be unfastened after the ceremony. It is believed that the longer the train, the longer the couple will be together. A wedding dress can be not only a wedding dress, you can choose a modest outfit in light colors. Modesty in dress concerns not only the bride, but also all the guests present. It is necessary that all women, without exception, wear dresses and skirts that are not flashy. If one of the guests refers to the wedding ceremony as a simple formality or a binding procedure, they can be invited directly to the banquet. It is not at all necessary that all the guests present at the registration of the marriage should also be present at the sacrament of the wedding.

For the wedding ceremony, newlyweds must purchase icons of the Savior and the Mother of God and consecrate them in the temple, wedding rings, wedding candles and a white embroidered towel on which they will stand during the sacred sacrament. Before the wedding ceremony, wedding rings are given to the priest. During the wedding ceremony, it will be necessary to hold the crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. As a rule, witnesses receive this honor. Therefore, it is better if they are tall, since holding crowns for forty minutes is not an easy task, which for a short person can be simply overwhelming.

The wedding rite is performed in the following sequence: betrothal, and then the wedding. The groom becomes right hand and the bride on the left. The priest, after praying to God for a blessing, having blessed the newlyweds three times, gives them lighted candles, symbolizing the purity of the newlyweds' motives for marriage and conjugal love, blessed by God, after which he puts the wedding ring on the finger of the groom, and then the bride, who were previously placed on the throne for consecration. After that, he changes them three times. According to church traditions, a gold ring is chosen for the wedding for the groom, and a silver one for the bride.

After the betrothal ceremony, the newlyweds go to the middle of the temple, where the priest asks them a question about the voluntariness of the decision made and about the obstacles to concluding a church marriage. Having received an answer to the questions posed, the priest and the newlyweds say prayers, after which the crowns are taken out and placed on the heads of the bride and groom. At the same time, the newlyweds read prayers, standing on a white embroidered towel, which symbolizes the same fate in everything. Then they take out a cup of wine, which acts as a symbol of joy and adversity, which the young from this moment will share all their lives. The young are presented with a cup of wine in three doses. After that, the priest joins the hands of the newlyweds and circles them three times around the lectern to church singing as a sign that from now on the marriage is indissoluble and concluded forever. The Orthodox wedding ceremony ends with the newlyweds standing at the Royal Doors of the altar, where the priest pronounces edification to the young family. After that, relatives can congratulate the newlyweds.

The significance of this rite in all ages is difficult to overestimate, because the meaning of the family in our life is perhaps the most important thing.

Sacrament of marriage in the Orthodox Church

The sacrament of a wedding (marriage) is established by the Orthodox catechism (guidelines for the doctrine of Christians), which contains the procedure for preparing for a wedding and conducting the ceremony, wedding prayers, days suitable for weddings, circumstances under which it is forbidden to conduct a ceremony, and other Divine institutions. The promise of those who marry before the Church to maintain marital fidelity is the basis for the blessing of their marital union, the birth of children and their Christian upbringing.

The marriage union of the first married couple of Adam and Eve was blessed by God, giving them a covenant to be fruitful and multiply. The covenant of God and the Sacrament of the marriage union is reflected in the book of Genesis and the Gospel, where the great mystery of marriage is compared with the mystery of the union of the Church with Christ. Emphasizing the height of the marriage union in the eyes of God, Jesus Christ repeatedly likens the way of dwelling in the Kingdom of Heaven to a wedding feast and celebration.

The history of the wedding ceremony

In the Old Testament period, the first wedding rite is mentioned in the description of the marriage of Isaac and Rebekah - negotiations between the groom's servant and the bride's father about the upcoming wedding, Isaac's giving gifts to Rebekah, and the wedding feast. Then the traditions are supplemented by a marriage contract, blessing those who are getting married in the presence of the groom's friends (married sons) and girlfriends accompanying the bride.

Traditions are supplemented by symbolic ritual actions: 7 blessings of the rabbi on marriage, good wishes of the guests, putting a gold ring on the bride's finger by the groom, reading the marriage contract in the presence of the rabbi and witnesses, a 7-day feast with the bridegroom handing over the agreed dowry to the bride.

Old Testament and Greco-Roman traditions and rituals influenced the emerging New Testament Christian wedding ceremony: the sacrament and holiness of the wedding, the establishment by God of the eternal union of the sexes. The apostle Paul calls those who ban marriages false teachers.

The Christian Church, without rejecting the Old Testament and Greco-Roman traditions, gives them new meaning, but the rituals of the X-XIII centuries are lost. In the XIV- XIX centuries the following traditions appear and are gradually polished, which founded the modern wedding ceremony:

XIV century - the celebration of the Sacrament of marriage by secular priests, the exchange of rings by the bride and groom, communion of those who are crowned with the Presanctified Gifts.
XV century - 3-fold blessing of the newlyweds with lit candles.
XVI century - the newlyweds ask for the blessing of the bishop, the bishop gives them a "crown memory" with instructions to the priest of the parish to check the absence of canonical obstacles to the wedding (matchmaking, nepotism, belonging to the clan and tribe). After the check (“search”), a family agreement is concluded, the priest in the groom’s house proclaims the prayer “groom to go after the bride”, accompanies the groom to the bride’s house, where he reads prayers, partially preserved in the modern rite. Parents bless the newlyweds and go with them to the church, where the sacrament of the wedding is performed.
XVII century - in the case of a divorce, a marriage contract provides for monetary compensation.
XVIII century - The sacrament of the wedding is carried out in 2 stages (betrothal and wedding), the interval between which lasts 6 weeks. The sacrament of the wedding is performed by the priest of the parish of one of the newlyweds. In 1765-1775. the issuance of a "crown memory" by a bishop and the time gap between betrothal and wedding (with the exception of weddings of the emperor's relatives) are cancelled.
XIX century - the wedding ceremony is confirmed by the witnesses of the bride and groom with their signatures in the temple metric book.

Canonical obstacles for a wedding, or who can't

The Catechism clearly defines the exhaustive reasons preventing church marriage from taking place:

4th wedding of the bride or groom;
wedding of second cousins and brothers;
one of the newlyweds is an atheist, guided by the conduct of the wedding ceremony not by spiritual, but by extraneous motives;
any of those who are getting married are not baptized and do not express their intention to be baptized;
one of the applicants for the wedding did not formalize the dissolution of the concluded civil marriage or do not have the consent of the bishop to the dissolution of the existing church marriage and blessing for a new church marriage;
wedding of godfather and mother of one child or godson with a godparent;
professing by any of those who are getting married a non-Christian religion;
the wedding of those who have taken the vow of monasticism or ordained priests and deacons;
lack of parental blessings for those who are underage;
mental or physical illness, which was the reason for the refusal of state registration of marriage.

Wedding according to the canons of the Catholic or Protestant Church or the accession of any spouse who was married according to a non-Christian rite to the Orthodox Church at their request remains in force according to Orthodox canons. Upon reaching the age of majority, the blessing of the parents is not necessary, the wedding can be held without their blessing.

Days of the year in which the wedding ceremony is not performed

Without the blessing of the bishop and in the absence of emergency reasons, the wedding ceremony cannot be held on the following days:

all days of 4 multi-day fasts (Great 49 days from Pure Monday to the end Holy Week; apostolic 1-5 weeks 1 week after the day of the Holy Trinity until 12.07; Uspensky 2 weeks 14-27.08; Rozhdestvensky 40 days from 28.11 to 06.01);
7 days before Great Lent (days of Cheese Shrovetide);
1 week after Easter (days of Bright Week);
12 days of Christmas time (07-18.01);
all Saturdays, Thursdays and Tuesdays;
on the eve of the twelfth, patronal and great holidays;
for the day and on the day of the celebration of the Exaltation of the Cross of the Lord (10-11.09 and 26-27.09) and the Beheading of the Head of I. Forerunner.

For example, in the second half of 2015, you can choose a wedding day only from 65 days in July-November, in December there are no days allowed for a wedding.

In addition to choosing the day of the wedding, it is necessary to agree with the priest on the hour of the wedding, because. you can practically get married only from 14 to 17 hours. This is due to the fact that the wedding is not held at night. The bride must attend the liturgy before the wedding, which is held from 13 to 14 o'clock, and after 17 o'clock the evening service begins in the church. Thus, the newlyweds are given 66 x 3 = 198 hours for the wedding in the second half of 2015.

Preparing for the wedding ceremony

First of all, the newlyweds choose the Orthodox Church, in which the priest is not under a canonical ban, is not a monk or the father of one of the newlyweds, and can conduct the sacrament of the wedding separately for this couple. Given the limited number of wedding hours in the temple, you need to make a preliminary appointment in advance.
Before the wedding, it is necessary to register a secular marriage and check if there are any reasons prohibiting the wedding. On the wedding day agreed with the priest, before the start of the Sacrament, the couple must undergo joint Communion, preparation for which includes:

1-3 days fast, excluding meat and dairy products;
100% dry fasting and no smoking from 24 hours to Communion;
3-day cessation of sexual activity;
reading before Communion of 3 canonical prayers.

When preparing for the wedding, you need to purchase wedding rings, a towel, wedding candles and icons, a scarf to cover the bride’s head, go Divine Liturgy. The bride should wear comfortable low-heeled shoes, do without jewelry and minimal makeup. Those who are getting married must wear pectoral crosses.

The attitude of the Church to the dissolution of marriage

The Church considers divorce to be a violation of the order established by God. the wedding unites the flesh of the spouses into a single whole, a person should not separate what is considered by God. The destruction of a marriage is a consequence of the hardness of heart and the weakness of a person who cannot always heed the prohibition of God.

The Church, showing condescension to the weakness of a person, condemns him for the dissolution of the marriage, but allows exceptions during his entire life a maximum of three times when the bishop removes the blessing given earlier and agrees to hold the wedding again. The hierarch can give permission only in case of obtaining a divorce in a secular marriage and in the absence of canonical reasons preventing a new marriage.

Initially, God indicated only adultery, which one of the spouses allowed, as the reason for the collapse of a married marriage, but over time, the list of reasons expanded and, in addition to adultery, includes:

new marriage of the spouse;
adoption of a non-Orthodox faith by a spouse;
the presence of vices unacceptable to human nature;
self-mutilation, which led to the inability to have sexual life;
missing;
actions of one spouse, leading to damage to the health or threat of death of the other spouse or their children;
mental illness recognized as incurable, alcoholism, syphilis, leprosy, AIDS, drug addiction;
abortion at the initiative of the spouse who did not obtain the consent of the father of the child.

As practice has shown, the list of reasons for the breakup of a marriage cannot be exclusive and is gradually expanding.

The wedding ceremony includes the betrothal and the wedding itself.

Betrothal with the blessing of the Church confirms the sincerity of the intentions, promises and feelings of those who are getting married, because. they make sure before all parishioners. The betrothal is carried out in a certain sequence.

The bride and groom stand respectively to the right and left of the altar, turning their faces towards him. The priest, through the Royal Doors, takes out the cross and the Gospel from the altar, and the deacon brings the wedding rings, which were left on the Throne during the celebration of the Liturgy. The priest blesses the betrothed with lit candles three times. If the wedding ceremony is performed by young people for the first time, the priest gives them lighted candles symbolizing chastity. The priest with the young people enters the inside of the temple and burns incense, proclaiming “blessed is our God” (censer smoke is a symbol of the grace of God that envelops the young like smoke). After reading the “usual beginning”, a great litany (diligent prayer) begins with petitions for the granting of children to those who are getting married, the sending down of perfect love and the blessing of an immaculate life, preservation in one faith and unanimity. In short prayers, God is praised, and blessings are asked from him for those who are getting married. The priest with a golden ring in his hand proclaims the betrothal of the groom three times, making the sign of the cross over his head, and puts the golden ring on his finger. Similar actions are performed with the bride with silver ring. After the exchange of rings three times, symbolizing the giving of the bride and groom to each other, the gold ring passes to the bride, conveying the masculine spirit of female weakness. The rite ends with a concluding prayer asking for blessings and a special litany with a petition for betrothal.

Marriage sets the stage for family life in the bosom and under the protection of the Orthodox Church. At the beginning of the wedding, the priest with a censer goes to the center of the temple, followed by young people with burning candles. The choir performs the 127th psalm, glorifying the wedding, blessed by God. Young people stand on boards in front of the lectern. The priest addresses those who are getting married with words of instruction, asks them questions, receives confirmation that they sincerely wish to be spouses and are not bound by promises to another bride or groom, and begins the wedding with the exclamation “Blessed is the Kingdom.” The Great Litany (peaceful) proclaims petitions for the spiritual and physical well-being of those who are getting married, 3 prayers are said for them. The main action of the sacrament of the wedding takes place - the priest crosswise marks the groom with a crown, then the bride and crowns them. The sacramental prayer is said, the Bogorodsk prokeimenon (one verse of the psalm), the 230th conception from the Epistle of Paul to the Ephesians, the Gospel of John (John 2; 1-11), litanies (excessive and petitionary), a prayer for the newlyweds. The church choir, those who are getting married and those present at the wedding proclaim the prayer "Our Father". The priest, over the cup of wine brought to the young, reads a prayer for the blessing of those who are married, makes the sign of the cross over the cup, the bride and groom take it three times, symbolizing the community of upcoming joys and sorrows. The priest escorts those who are getting married three times around the lectern to the performance of solemn troparions (prayer chants about the essence of the wedding). At the conclusion of the Sacrament, the priest removes the crowns from the married, greets them, urging them to keep God's commandments, 2 final prayers are said, the newlyweds kiss, congratulating each other. After the dismissal (the end of the ceremony) and the final prayer, the married people kiss the icons of the Savior and the Mother of God and accept congratulations on the marriage from those present.

Features of the wedding in the Greek Catholic Church in Ukraine

A wedding ceremony in the Greek Catholic Church is distinguished by some more democratic details of the ceremony. Before the wedding, a training course is held in the amount of 19 lessons, to confess and take the sacrament on the eve of the wedding. To register a marriage, a certificate of training and a protocol of preparation for the ceremony are additionally provided.

The language of worship is usually Ukrainian. But in the church of the Holy Eucharist, by agreement with the priest for foreigners who do not speak Ukrainian, the wedding is held in Russian and five European languages.

Instead of paying for the rite, the church accepts a voluntary donation, and not a mandatory strictly regulated payment, the amount of the donation is determined by the newlyweds in accordance with their financial capabilities, the desire to invite a festive choir and use other attributes that emphasize the importance of the wedding.

A wedding with a believer of another religion requires the blessing and consent of the bishop, who individually considers each specific situation.

Women's menstrual cycles are not considered an obstacle to attending church and performing the sacrament of the wedding.

The reasons that prevent church marriage are not strictly regulated; if certain difficulties arise, they are considered individually in compliance with the rules of the Greek Catholic Church.

The difference between secular and church marriage

A secular marriage is not always concluded on the basis of the love of the bride and groom for each other; cases of arranged marriages are not uncommon. A wedding in the Church involves the unity of souls and following the commandments of God. This is the essence of the sacrament of marriage. The Church does not consider secular marriage to be sinful. it is not sinful adultery and provides for certain norms of behavior in family life established by secular laws. Unlike a secular marriage, cohabitation, which is fashionable to call a civil marriage, is a sin according to church canons, which is the main reason for the impossibility of a wedding. Spouses who have lived for many years in a secular unmarried marriage can, if desired, undergo the Sacrament of the wedding with a special rite, somewhat different from the canonical wedding.

Secular marriage provides wide circle reasons for divorce, more than half of secular marriages end in divorce. The Church strictly limits the dissolution of an ecclesiastical marriage to exceptional circumstances and does not use the term "dethronement", although it may, as an exception, bless the second and third marriages. The responsibility of spouses in a church marriage is incomparably higher than in a secular one. they answer to the objective judgment of God, and not to the subjective laws created by mankind. This is confirmed by unofficial statistics conducted by a graduate of the theological seminary in the city of Pushkino. Married marriages break up in 68% of cases due to the infidelity of one of the spouses, and the reasons for the divorce of secular marriages are the difference in characters, the loss of mutual respect, the virtual absence of marital relations, unsettled marital life and other reasons.

For many years, the wedding ceremony has been gaining in strength and popularity. Some of the newlyweds pay tribute to fashion, others approach this sacrament with full responsibility, taking this step quite consciously, the lights believe in spiritual power and understand the meaning of the ceremony. God gives the young his blessing on the bonds between spouses, the birth of children and their upbringing in Christianity.

Modern youth knows about the sacrament of marriage from books and videos that can be viewed on the Internet today. In Rus', this ritual was performed in ancient times. At the wedding, this action was the most important, and without a wedding in the church, marriage between a woman and a man was not recognized. In those days, it was believed that only before God could young people become spouses. For the first time, a person learned about the sacrament of the wedding from the book "Genesis", dedicated to the marriage of Isaac to Rebekah. You can find out how their wedding ceremony took place today from the video.

Information also came to us from the writings of the Holy Fathers and the surviving documents, which stipulated the rules of the rite. It is almost impossible to trace all the changes in the Orthodox Church that have taken place over the centuries. But historians managed to highlight the main points.

Marriage crowns were placed on the heads of the young. For the first time they began to do this in the East in the IV century. At first, fresh flowers were used for these purposes. Later crowns began to be made of metal. By appearance they looked like a crown.
In the western part Byzantine Empire during the wedding ceremony, marriage covers were used.

Crowns and covers meant holy faith in the Lord God. It is believed that until the 7th century, the marriage between spouses took place with blessed rings and a sacred prayer, similar to a modern chant. The church did not share the Orthodox wedding ceremony until the 9th century. A civil marriage was concluded between the spouses, after which she participated in the process of worship in the church. In this rank, they were joined to the Mystery of the Saints of Christ, which meant a symbol of marriage. The newlyweds took full responsibility for the family, guided by the state laws of that time.

At the end of the 10th and beginning of the 11th centuries, the first custom appeared in the Orthodox church wedding, according to which the bride and groom received candles. They began to lay crowns on their heads and the accompanying words were uttered - "Christ crowns." Then the priest read a prayer, and at the end of it he joined the hands of the young, saying the words - "Christ welcomes."

Over the following years, the process of the wedding ceremony changed. Starting from the 13th century, it was accompanied by the words: "The servant of God is getting married." After 2 centuries, new traditions appeared: a certain prayer was read, and the crowns were in the church, and not in the house.

Modern wedding ceremony in the church

The government authorizes the wedding ceremony. It can be held immediately after the registration of marriage or on any other day. According to church customs, not everyone can do this.

Orthodoxy does not give consent to the procedure to unbaptized people, grooms under 18 and brides who are under 16 years old.
If the bride or groom professes a different faith, you must obtain permission for the wedding. At the same time, the husband or wife must give a written commitment to raise children according to Orthodox laws.
The Church does not approve of marriages between blood relatives (kinship up to the third generation inclusive). The permission of the head of the diocese will also be needed if spiritual relatives wish to get married. These may be godparents of the children of one married couple.
The ceremony can be performed no more than three times. But even the second time at the wedding there are certain difficulties.

The wedding takes place only on the basis of a marriage registration certificate. There are certain days on which the ceremony can be performed. During multi-day fasts and church holidays marriage does not take place. Some families get married after the birth of their first child. Others want to test their feelings and put off the process for several years.

Order of church marriage

As soon as a decision is made to hold a wedding ceremony, the day of the wedding should be discussed with the priest. The wedding can be filmed and photographed. You should also discuss with the priest where the photographer can be during the ceremony and what can be filmed. Preparation for the wedding should be carried out in advance. In this case, some points should be taken into account.

It is very important to prepare mentally for a church marriage: to take communion and confess. Before the wedding, you should fast for 3 days. On the day of the union of family ties before God, it is not recommended to smoke or take alcohol.

Rules of conduct in the temple

The wedding guests and their guests must adhere to certain rules:

Women must wear a headdress. The clothes of the groom, bride and guests should cover their shoulders and legs. Women are not advised to enter the church in trousers.
Bright makeup is unacceptable, it should be close to the natural look.
It is advisable to enter the temple in advance, 15 minutes before the start of the ceremony.
Mobile phones should be turned off.
During the wedding, moving around the temple is not allowed.
On the left side of the hall are women, on the right - men.
It is not supposed to stand with your back to the iconostasis.
The right hand is used for baptism.

The wedding lasts for an hour. Not all guests can withstand such a long procedure. Therefore, it is better for them to stay outside the temple or at its entrance. The rules must be strictly observed by all people present at the wedding in an Orthodox church.

Debunking procedure

Unfortunately, not all couples are able to save the marriage and they have to break it off. The Church has a negative attitude towards divorces and the process of debunking, as such does not exist for her. But in some cases, the Orthodox Church may give permission for a second wedding. This applies to widows and widowers. Reasons for dissolution of a church marriage can also be:

Change of one of the spouses;
Inability to conceive a child;
Forced marriage;
Threat to the life of children and spouse;
mental illness;
Getting rid of the child without the consent of the husband to this action;
Various types of serious diseases, such as alcoholism, drug addiction, AIDS, etc.

Permission is given only to the spouse who is innocent of the breakup of the family. But before you remarry, you must repent and confess.