How to learn to have fun in the discomfort zone. How to improve your standard of living: the technique of small steps

Comfort zone- this is the area of ​​our living space in which we feel comfortable and safe. On the one hand, it protects us from stress, on the other hand, it slows down our personal growth. How to expand your comfort zone?

Being in a comfort zone, a person performs his habitual actions, which are interesting to him and do not cause discomfort (fatigue, impatience, fear). In the comfort zone, everything is predictable and stable.

The comfort zone is like soap bubble, outside of which is an unfamiliar and dangerous surrounding world - risk area(area of ​​possible actions, a field of possibilities). Exit to the risk zone from the comfort zone, as a rule, is accompanied by discomfort, but it is a necessary condition for the development of personality. In the comfort zone, we are, as it were, “mothballed”: since we feel good and comfortable, we are not going to change anything. We do not develop, and if nothing is done, then over time, personality degradation may begin.

Therefore, it is very important to learn expand your comfort zone: learn to do those things that you don’t want to do, or are scared, but necessary. Usually, the younger a person is, the more willingly he expands his comfort zone, and the easier it is for him to do so. Usually, the expansion of the boundaries of the comfort zone occurs in three stages.

Stage 1- awareness of boundaries. It is necessary to understand which actions and habits we perform with pleasure, and which cause us discomfort, i.e. out of our comfort zone.
Stage 2- being at the edge of the comfort zone. We realize at what exact moment the exit from the comfort zone comes, uncertainty, fear, etc. appear. and we are making the first attempts to enter the risk zone.
Stage 3- expansion of the comfort zone. If we regularly perform certain actions, we gradually include them in our comfort zone.

To successfully expand the comfort zone, several important conditions must be met. First, you need clear motivation. Answer the question: “Why do I need to do this?”, “What will it give me?” The key word is "to me", not to parents, teachers or other people, but to you personally. If you do not have a personal interest, the comfort zone will remain within its former boundaries.

Secondly, change your attitude to the situation. Usually, going outside the comfort zone is associated with something scary and difficult. Convince yourself that where your comfort zone ends is not a dark forest filled with danger, but an exciting and interesting new world to conquer. In development, one should see not its difficult aspects, but interesting ones.

Don't try to expand your comfort zone in all directions at once. Start with just one, and preferably - not too unpleasant for you. For example, you are used to getting up in the morning at the last moment and running out to work without having breakfast. Start setting your daily alarm for 10 minutes tomorrow and have a cup of coffee with a sandwich before leaving for work.

Keep in mind that the comfort zone will expand far from immediately. It will take about three weeks for the action to become a habit and stop “straining” regular daily repetitions. Try not to shirk or procrastinate until the last minute - the more you put off, the harder it is to start.

At first, you most likely will not feel discomfort, fueled by enthusiasm caused by a new beginning. But over time, the enthusiasm will dry up, and there may be a desire to give up on everything. If you do so, the comfort zone will again take its usual boundaries, and all efforts to expand it will go to dust.

In such a case, there are a couple of tricks to help move on. Eg, written reminders. Put stickers in prominent places that call for action. May I help. Or take yourself "on the weak."

Can enlist the support of friends: make a bet with them that you will be sorry to lose. Or just tell about your idea to as many friends as possible. If they support your undertaking, you will try to support their faith in you. If they are skeptical about it, you will want to prove to them that you can do everything.

The comfort zone must constantly expand - without this, personal growth is impossible. And if you approach expanding your comfort zone not as a necessary evil, but as an exciting test, you will save yourself from discomfort and easily reach new heights.

In order for a butterfly to learn to fly, it needs to break its dense cocoon. If you help her, she will never be able to fly. Likewise, we need to make an effort to achieve something.

There is a cozy place where we feel comfortable and safe.

If you are happy with yourself and what you have, you are a happy person. You don't need anything else.

What you do not have (love, family, respect, recognition, fulfillment, communication, money, travel, etc.) is outside the comfort zone.

It sounds trite, but many of us are afraid of even minor changes. Everything that is outside our comfort zone is perceived as disturbing and unpleasant. That is why most people cannot change their lives for the better. Too many difficulties.

If you want something more, to achieve certain goals, to realize your full potential, then the comfort zone turns into an ominous zone, into your cage.

In the comfort zone, your results remain at the same level that they were originally. No room for development, no room for change. Living in a comfortable case can be fatal to your life.

It often happens that you want to do something new that you have not done before, but suddenly it becomes uncomfortable, there is a desire to leave everything as it is, and in most cases everything really remains the same. This is your comfort zone. Everyone has it, only someone has it more, and someone has less.

For example, someone easily manages to get acquainted with the opposite sex, because this skill is in their comfort zone. However, it didn't exist before. Any skill can be acquired, but for this you have to leave your comfort zone. Everything new causes discomfort, and this is normal, because we are all human.

What does the comfort zone include?

1. Environment and space.

People with whom you are accustomed to communicate, office, apartment, places of rest, countries, cities, routes. All places where you are accustomed to be.

2. Lifestyle. Model of behavior and thinking, any habits.

For example, you don't want to go to an unfamiliar company if you are a shy person. You will find many reasons why you should not go there. Your comfort zone tends to stay in a stable state and does not let you go on "adventures" that threaten to break stability. Fear of something is defined by the boundaries of your comfort zone.

We retreat out of fear of losing the comfort of familiar and safe concepts. When a person says “I can’t”, it often means: “I’m afraid to experience, to experience new sensations.”

Therefore, one of the important things that divides people into more and less successful is the experience of transforming the fear of expanding the comfort zone into the energy of success.

How to get out of the comfort zone?

As a rule, when leaving the comfort zone, a person experiences stress, tension. You have to learn to enjoy getting out of your comfort zone. That is, make it a habit for yourself to get out of your comfort zone. After all, the skydivers also experienced fear during the first jump, but then it passed, and the situation became comfortable. The comfort zone needs to be expanded a little. Remember that feeling uncomfortable in new situations is natural!

One way to expand your comfort zone is to start connecting with other people who have a wider comfort zone. Eventually other people will pull you into their comfort zone.

1. Mentally praise yourself as you expand your comfort zone. When you take a new action, give yourself a gift. This will create positive reinforcement.

2. Remember the goals for which you are doing this. This will make it easier for you to do something new.

3. Do things that seemed impossible, gradually, step by step. – Change seats within 30 days. Take different routes to work, to different cafes, cinemas, museums, walk in different places. Communicate with strangers. Ask how to get there, greet sellers and cashiers, use every opportunity to talk to strangers. Be curious, ask questions frequently on any topic within common sense and the law, ask for whatever you need in any situation.

4. Make an action plan to expand your comfort zone for each day and follow it. New habits are usually built in within 21 days, so expand your comfort zone a little every day using the instructions.

Remember that goals are outside of your comfort zone. AND new level comfort is outside the current comfort zone.

When we experience something new, we gain confidence that makes us feel strong and content. It helps us bring new ideas to life and gives us the determination to move forward into the new and the unknown.

Dear readers! We often advise you to expand your comfort zone in order to become rich and successful, achieve all your goals and change your life for the better. But in reality, it turns out that not everyone correctly understands the meaning of these calls, since now they have become very popular and are used everywhere: in business trainings, by psychologists, coaches and bloggers. And the first thing that many imagine when they hear the call to get out of their comfort zone is a long hike with a backpack through the forests or a parachute jump. In fact, the meaning of this call is much deeper. Let's make it clear what exactly lies behind it in our sphere - in.

The comfort zone is the state in which you are used to. This is your normal lifestyle: your apartment, family, work, hobby. For some, it is customary to wake up every morning at 7:00 and rush to the office, for some it is to spend the whole day doing housework, and for some, even a difficult mountain hike is in the comfort zone, for example, for mountaineering instructors and sportsmen-rankers. Here everything is individual.

Also, the comfort zone is your personal level of permission, including financial. It is the right to have or not to have, to be or not to be, to do or not to do, which you give yourself.

Someone allows himself to dine in good restaurants, while someone at the same income level hastily snacks on “doshirak”.

Someone takes the daring right to have everything he wants, he strives for his goals and gets what he wants, while someone prefers to take a passive position: to sit quietly in his corner, do what others expect of him, and not stick out, "to be like everyone else."

Someone dreams of a powerful Gelendvagen and eventually buys it, while someone is content with an old Ford all his life.

Someone opens his own business and enthusiastically does what he loves - and someone “plows” for years at a hated job for a meager salary, which is only enough for food.

All of the above also depends on the width of your comfort zone. It's a matter of your choice. According to, you can choose any life scenario from the Options Space at your own discretion. So why do so many people choose such modest options and settle for little? But because more is not included in their comfort zone!

Why expand your comfort zone in transurfing?

Once you make a decision and let everything you want to have into your comfort zone: a yacht, bank accounts, a mansion, love, fame, fame, travel, victories in sports competitions - whatever you want, you will begin to radiate a certain quality energy and gradually attract all these things and events into your life.

You will be filled with inner confidence that you can really have it all. But what we focus our mental energy and our attention on is what we get.

If you are far from being a millionaire yet, but five-star hotels are already in your comfort zone, you are on the right track.

If you have been alone for several years, but do not despair and broadcast love to the world around you - love for yourself, love for people, love for life, love for your work - then very soon love in the form of a man or woman close to you in spirit will definitely enter into your life.

How to expand your financial comfort zone and learn to afford more?

In this video, Tatyana Samarina gives advice on how to expand your financial comfort zone in Transurfing and raise your level of permission to become rich and successful!

5 steps to get out of your comfort zone

However, it is not so easy to take and expand the comfort zone. You can strongly desire something with your Mind, but your Soul will actively resist it, or vice versa. You will be held back by negative attitudes that you don’t even notice, but which are firmly planted in your subconscious. Everyone has their own attitudes, for example: “Money is evil!”; "The rich are not honest"; "You need to be like everyone else"; "There are no worthy men left"; "Family interferes with career"; "Career interferes with the family" and so on.

You need to step out of your comfort zone, expand it, increase your level of permission gradually. You should not thoughtlessly spend all your savings on an expensive car or go to a restaurant with the last money if you want to become rich and let money into your comfort zone.

We suggest you start with 5 small but significant steps: remove restrictions from your Mind, hear the true desires of your Soul, reduce importance, start broadcasting confidence, and only then - act.

Step #1. Convince Your Mind

You need to learn how to convince your Mind that you are worthy of what you want. You can “let” wealth, success or love into your comfort zone as much as you like, but if your mind stubbornly does not believe that you will ever be able to buy yourself a mansion or create a strong happy family“Unfortunately, you won’t be able to do anything.

How to Convince Your Mind? There are special techniques for this, including meditations and rituals that affect your subconscious and your mind. We regularly give all these practices at webinars and online courses. For example, working with target slides:

“Positive slides help put the incredible into your comfort zone. When you stop experiencing mental discomfort from the thought that your dream is available to you, doubts will disappear, and faith will turn into knowledge. The soul will come into agreement with the mind, and you will have the determination to have "().

Many believe that everyone has only what they want. If you cannot afford a trip to Italy, lunch at a restaurant, an expensive foreign car and serious relationship, which means that at the moment this is your ceiling, your desire. But it is important to understand that the ceiling can and should be raised. It takes effort, but it's doable.

What is the "norm level" and how is it related to the "monetary ceiling"

The "Money Ceiling" is your level of norm in the financial area of ​​life. However, there is a level of norm in everything and absolutely everyone. The essence of the concept lies in what you consider acceptable at the moment. For one, it is natural to eat vegetables and fruits every day, and for the other - fast food or doshirak. We accept and live with it without feeling hurt.

Someone in the family allows himself to scream, use swear words, and this is quite normal for him, he is so used to it. The other one leaves forever when they raise their voice only once. In his system of coordinates, such a violation of personal boundaries is unthinkable. This usually doesn't happen to him.

One is ready to work for a penny, stay after work for several hours, correct other people's mistakes at the request of the boss. Another grows professionally, earns more, builds a career. He does not imagine how one can devalue one's work and endure unconstructive criticism of management. His "money ceiling" is quite high, and he does not represent life below the real level.

How to work with the level of the norm

It seems that you are locked into the boundaries of the normal level. But they can be moved. To get started, draw a few columns and divide them into lines, enter questions at the top, for example, “Where do I live?”, And below is the answer. First, tell us about the real state of things, why indicate what you want. For example, "I live in a room, I want to live in a spacious apartment." The question is “What do I work for?”, The answer is: “I work as a legal adviser, I want to become the head of the legal department.” What you have now is your current normal level. Why? Because you can exist at this level for a long time without changing anything drastically. It's convenient for you.

Whether you like it or not, this stage you can get just such a level of norm, just such a position, salary, spouse. What you send is what you get. So, you need to change yourself, your attitude to reality. It is not easy. Sometimes it is almost impossible to force yourself to take a step and move to a higher level.

To help yourself, work through each item on the plate. Choose five points and try to make them a reality. For example, you dine in the office, but you want to - in a particular restaurant, but there is not enough money. Go to a dream restaurant, order a cup of tea or coffee there. The order will not ruin you, but will allow you to feel what it is like to rise above reality, to be one level higher.

Perhaps at first you will be embarrassed, but then you get used to the new sensations, you will understand that you no longer agree to lunch from the canteen. Start looking for ways to eat only in a restaurant.

Level of norm and level of motivation

Usually you associate the realization of a dream with some situation that is possible in the future. For example, if I start earning more, then I will allow myself something. But, as a rule, this scheme does not work well. You continue to work where you worked, to receive what you received. Expect others to solve your problems and fulfill your desires. Try the opposite: first touch the dream, and then take a step to make it a reality. Don't say, "I want someday if...", just do it. For you, this will become motivation, you will remember how good you were.

Instead of taking the subway, call a taxi. The trip will be your inspiration, motivation. Inspire yourself with sensations from the future in which you are going to live. By raising the level of the norm in this way, you will learn how to spend and earn. If you could afford business class once, then you can do it again. Like in sports. If you ran 42 kilometers once, the second time will be easier.

The main thing - do not despair, do not lose motivation. Move in small steps. Buy not a handbag, but a wallet. Go to a restaurant and have a cup of coffee - get in touch with the beautiful. There is nothing terrible in this. You will not go broke, but you will find yourself in a wonderful atmosphere where you dreamed of going and then you will no longer want to go to a simpler place.

And you yourself will not notice how the habit of the best instead of the good will affect all areas of life. The goal must be real. Not “I will make money, then I will buy the whole store”, but “I will analyze the current financial condition and while I buy a scarf. Don't expect your life to change overnight. Then you will avoid disappointments that will lead you astray.

Set realistic goals. If you initially aim at too far an ideal, you risk losing motivation along the way. Start small. Teach yourself to believe in the possibilities, give yourself time to settle into a new level, and then take another step. For example, when going on a difficult business trip, take a ticket not for economy, but for business.

The "throughput" of money

It happens like this: a person’s business went uphill for objective reasons, because he is an excellent specialist or does a good product. His “money ceiling” has risen, but he begins to lower it: he spends thoughtlessly, invests in dubious projects. This happens because a person does not know how to pass a lot of money through his hands, he is not ready, he has not learned. What will help? Only awareness, work on attitudes on your own or with a psychologist. The amounts that are earned should be spent on adequate purposes, dispose of them competently. Any funds can be lost, but it can also be invested in growth.

How are cheating and the level of normality related?

One girl asked the question: “Could you forgive betrayal?” I could not answer it, since my level of norm in a relationship does not imply betrayal at all. There is no such thing in my coordinate system. It's like asking, "Could you eat out of a dumpster if there's no restaurant nearby." The whole situation seems absurd. It's all about what you allow in your life and what you don't. The level of norm in every area of ​​life plays a huge role.

Do not be surprised that as you increase your level of norm, you will encounter condemnation and misunderstanding. We are not used to wanting more. Know, cricket, your hearth, according to Senka, a hat - many proverbs and sayings call for not sticking out and staying at a level that is comfortable. But these attitudes prevent us from moving forward. Stay with your opinion, avoid people who devalue your efforts. And this applies not only to finances. Believe that you deserve the best in every area of ​​your life.

Very often, the fear of “breaking away” from loved ones prevents you from reaching the desired level of norm. It is worth preparing for the fact that many will remain below. Not everyone is ready to grow. But don't be afraid to set goals and ignore those who try to bring you down. Increasing the level of the norm is a way out of the comfort zone. This makes you a leader, special, someone's envy should not stand in the way. You can afford more, make your dreams come true.

about the author

Business coach, entrepreneur, motivational speaker.

The Comfort Zone is your habitual places, habitual people, habitual clothes, habitual objects, habitual thoughts, habitual actions.

In the Comfort Zone you:

• don't stress
• do everything automatically
• relaxed.

What harms the Comfort Zone

• Man does not develop
• consciousness falls asleep (mechanism, reflexes, controllability, humility),
• degradation,
• the Comfort Zone narrows (an extreme case is a drug addict, his Comfort Zone = high state),
• needs are shrinking
• a person does not see the point of moving beyond the existing framework,
• there is no improvement in the quality of life,
• arises
  the feeling that maximum isolation from communication with the world is good
  a solution to all problems that will support a comfortable existence of one's own.

If we keep doing what we do, we keep getting what we get.
Stephen Covey

Comfort

• You have everything: tea, coffee, sofa, newspaper, TV, borscht, mobile phone. This is the Comfort Zone where you hang out and enjoy what you already have.
• You have no desire to achieve something more.
• Deep down you want a different pastime and you really are not satisfied with the environment, but changes will inevitably entail some kind of explanation. Too lazy to start a debate.
• You don't have the motivation to jump.
• You do not find any sense in the fuss of searching for something new.
• You do not have an incentive to invent and achieve.
• You live a gray monotonous life every day. And all the time trying to improve relationships and increase your income. Sluggish attempts lead to nothing and then there is nothing left but to enjoy what is.
• On a subconscious level, you have a feeling that your destiny should have been much brighter, that you were created for something much more, that you could live interestingly and be a happy person.

All the wonders of the universe extend beyond your sofa! All you have to do is get out of bed and get to work! Leaving a warm and cozy place, you will feel slightly uncomfortable. Therefore, act methodically, and step by step, carefully pour into the process.

To leave the Comfort Zone:

1. Understanding what is outside your Comfort Zone: all kinds of gifts, various miracles, in abundance of the wealth of the Universe.
2. The emergence of a desire to have something more and permission to stop saving.
3. Raising the bar of your desires. Desire to live a better life than you live now: to have a car best brand and house better than that where you currently live.
4. The desire to improve the standard of living of their loved ones and relatives. Wish a better life for your parents and send them to travel or provide them with paid diagnostics and services in an expensive clinic where they cannot pay for the treatment on their own. Or want to build an orphanage with swimming pools and playgrounds.
5. The ability to improvise on the theme of great opportunities and dream of becoming famous. Ambition rules the world. You may wish to leave a mark on history and become famous. This is a very high bar. and it can serve as a motivation for you, stimulating you to move forward.
6. Expanding your Comfort Zone. The development of personality and the growth of material wealth are possible only through the expansion of the Comfort Zone. By increasing and developing your Comfort Zone, you increase and develop your income.

1. Small Steps

You need to start moving in small steps, there is no need to cover everything at once. You don't have to do things that make you nervous. Do not overload yourself, there is no need to start overworking from the start. As in sports, start with a light weight and gradually increase the load. It's just so safe.

• Change your daily routine
• change the environment
• change the environment
• constantly change your routes,
• learn new foods and culinary dishes,
• strive for new experiences (cinema, circus, theater, exhibitions),
• start traveling
• change appearance, fashion style,
• meet new people.

2. Enjoy the Process

You need to learn to enjoy the process. Associate your discomfort with the most powerful pleasure.

3. Write down new actions and praise

Write down every day your new actions for today in your diary of achievements. Praise yourself constantly, regularly, a lot.

4. Remember your Goal

Remember your Goal and the reason for which you have conceived all this, for the sake of which you are ready to endure and cope with these not very comfortable conditions.

5. Prizes and Incentives

Come up with such surprises and gifts that you will gladly reward yourself for each new action you take outside your Comfort Zone. It can be all those things that lead you to bliss and delight. For example, exotic food, fashionable clothes, an important purchase, going to a concert.

I know of no more inspiring force than the perseverance of man to improve his life through conscious effort.
Henry David Togo

Conscious Effort to Break Out of the Comfort Zone

• The desire to develop
• learning habit,
• striving to achieve new goals,
• inspiration,
• enthusiasm,
• the need to raise the standard of living,
• self encouragement,
• strong motivational goal,
• affirmations and visualization
• intensifying dreams,
• the positive influence of the environment,
• discipline.

Habitual actions lead to habitual results. Breaking out of the Comfort Zone is possible only with the help of new actions! All the wildest dreams and zealous goals are located outside the Comfort Zone!

Passionate desire to expand the Comfort Zone and intensive actions in this direction provide you with unlimited opportunities to control your reality!

I love you friends! And I know that you will succeed! We are all created to be happy! Take action! Love each other! Enjoy the Universe! All gifts are waiting for you!

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